The Hell with Adhaalath!

THIS PISSES ME OFF!

Demi Prophet of the Maldives.

See that Hagrid-wannabe in the picture above? It just so happens that I DO NOT want his ARAB BULLSHIT dictated to me or any other citizen of my country.

If I want to dance/play music on New Years, I DO NOT want to seek HIS GODDAMN PERMISSION to do so.

Why is he ordering the closure of Discos? Because it's 'unIslamic'?

What about the fact that he's the head of an entire bloody ministry that is funded by a Government that runs on sinful tourism money - made from selling sinful alcohol to sinful fornicating couples on a sinful romantic tours on our holy '100% Muslim' islands?!

They say my 'Freedom of Expression' is guaranteed by the Constitution as far as it doesn't 'violate basic Islamic tenets'.

Surely, calling that retard Abdul Majeed Abdul Baree a bloody wangosaurus rex doesn't violate lslam? Bloody nard hound.

We've heard them say that our little 8 year old girls are 'mature' enough to fulfill their pedophile fantasies.

We've heard them tell us we're not muslims if we don't look like bloody Manta Rays.

We've had these freaks telling us that our women cannot stand for leadership.

We've heard them lying through their teeth that we don't have non-Muslim Maldivians.

We've heard them telling us our women are all bound for hell cuz they're somehow 'more sinful'.

We've heard them talking all kinds of bullcrap.

I think it's about time we've had enough.

I DID NOT sign up for this! Hell if I knew Aneh Dhivehi Raajje was in Saudi Bloody Arabia. I want out. Now.

[P.S. : I'm normally a non-violent guy. But right now, my New Years Resolution is to do all I can to see these Adhaalath Mullahs bitch-slapped all the way back to Arabia.]

Merry Christmas!

Season's greetings y'all.

Been itching to get my hands on an internet able pc. but darn my luck so far.
Wish you all a Merry Christmas.

Prepare to CRASH LAND!

All right. Here's how it goes.

I love her terribly. But I think she's going to dump me.

Any expert survival tips? :-/

PS. She's the absolute loveliest, perfect girl ever invented. Ouch.

Bangalored!

Fun's over, I'm outta here!

I'm going home for a month long break - which means my faithful readers (Yes, all TWO of you) MAY have to go without a post for a while.

But don't pop the champagne yet, and don't take my word for it. I can't trust myself over this! :p

It's also been an unexpectedly tumultuous week personally. I leave with a heavy heart and a bucketful of troubled thoughts. But I think an 18 hour train journey ought to fix me up almost all right. ;-)

That reminds me, I gotta leave in an hour. Gotta pack now.. have a vacation to begin!

Wish me a safe journey. Ta.

~Peace.

P.S. - Google tells me this is my 301st post. Damn. I'm past 300 already?

Why I Never Learnt Dhivehi..

If there's ONE language I want to go extinct, it's got to be this.

Here's a message I received on my phone yesterday.

Barakaaitheri Hajju dhuvahaai, ufaaveri Eidul 'Azhuh'aa ge thahniyaa aai mubaarak baadhee (?!) aris kuran-...

Huh, what?!

Well. In short, 'Eid Greetings.'

I'm normally a person who LOVES languages - and all the culture and literature associated with it.

But NOT Dhivehi 'Maaiy bas'. That irritatingly long, drawn out, specious and utterly pretentious 'language' adopted by Maldivian Government spokespersons, News reporters and some unfortunate highly ranked officials makes me CRINGE.

What's with all the highfalutin', grandiloquent bullcrap? Why can't they just speak NORMALLY?

I do not approve of any language that can contain 9 adjectives for one noun. (And if you've ever heard that fat lady in the Education ministry praise the former Evil-Dictator Golhaabo, you know what I'm talking about)

It almost sounds like they're talking in some code language. What's the whole point? Isn't it so much easier to articulate an idea in the common language?

And seriously. Whoever came up with "Mubaarak baadhee" ?!

Son of God visits Maldives?!

Holy Blasphemous weekend! Ghastly events are sure occurring in the Maldives.

Just this last week, I read that the country's demi-prophet, Abdul Majeed Abdul Baree Abdul scratch one Abdul, has discovered a website that is run by NOBODY!

Bleeding Jesus! A Maldive site promoting Christianity? How did THIS happen in our 110% Islamic country surrounded by pristine blue Zam Zam water? (Another 2 years, and Abdul Abdul swears even the Fishes will have beards)

Now, our benevolent leaders have repeatedly assured us that such a thing as a 'Maldive Christian' has yet to walk the Earth. There are NO non-Muslim Maldivians. None. Zilch. Zero. The Islam is genetically coded into our Maldive DNA, by the writ of Constitution. All of us. Bar None.

Now this DOES worry me. Cuz according to Abdul Abdul, (and Abdul Abdul never speaketh a LIE as it is unbecoming of a demi-prophet) this strange, inexplicable website once existed - threatening to convert us all into Cross bearing, Thorn wearing, Christianomaniacs that even the Son of Mary would envy.

And by the time people discovered the website name, it was NOWHERE to be found! The website just disappeared miraculously from the Maldives overnight- proving once again that the Adhaalath's demi Prophets strike fear into Nobody!

Apparently, Abdul Abdul used his Divine Authority to ban the Cross wielding website, along with some other blasphemous activities involving the infidels Cross - including Hot cross buns and Tic Tac Toe.

Anyways, I had momentary urge to ask that enlightened Buddha, Sheikh Fareed, how in a land where NOBODY is Non-Muslim could a *insert unspeakable sinful word here and burn in hell* Christian website come up?

But then, I figured that it could prove to be counter productive.

You see, he would have just reiterated his stand that NO such Maldivians exist and that such a website could only be a miracle.

Upon which all his followers would gasp in collective horror, chant in unison 'Yes! Yes! Verily! Verily! A Miracle it indeed isth!!' and declare the sacred website to be run by none other than the Holy Spirit himself.

Now wouldn't that suck?